Things not to say to your customer

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GnomeyNewt

New member
I'm writing an article on things not to say to your customer. I have a few ideas, but I'm looking for a few more. Possibly things you've said that either backfired on you or you just flat out should not say. Here are some that I've actually seen my co-workers in the past say to customers:

1) "Sorry for the hold, I had diarrhea and had to use the bathroom" I'm not kidding you. My co-worker said this to a customer on live chat. :disagree:

2) "Just stop complaining" Yups :rolleyes:
 
"Listen, if you don't like the service, you are welcome to take your site elsewhere."

Not something that I said, but I heard other people say it. :)

Another one that I think quite a few people hear about is:

"Go ahead, sue us!"
 
GnomeyNewt said:
Never said it, but certainly do feel like saying it sometimes. :forK:
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I have been told this once by Siteturn Networks that kept charging my CC every 3 months few times in a row after termination of service. What a horribly run outlet that place is... It turns my stomach every time I think about it. :tired:
 
Depends on the context of "Being Serious" or "Having a Laugh". Business philosophy's changes you can joke with some customers which is rare in the hosting industry, however with other industries I have been in you can have a personal relationship with your customers.
 
Artashes said:
I have been told this once by Siteturn Networks that kept charging my CC every 3 months few times in a row after termination of service. What a horribly run outlet that place is... It turns my stomach every time I think about it. :tired:
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I've had my share of crappy hosts in the past, never did use this line tho...

In times I've wanted to say it, its people who say "I make 1 million dollars a day and I'll sue you if you don't bring my website back up this instant!" ... I want to say ... "Yes Sir! You pay $4.95/month for hosting and make 1 million dollars a day? Go ahead, sue us!" ... Of course they were just suspended for getting an entire block of class C ip addresses null routed and the ip tech at the datacenter is currently out for the day. :smash:

Another thing you should never say to a client -- SHUT UP!
 
I've had a host tell me

"your some ****ing idiot dumb ****!! don't waste my time if you don't want our offer"

I was quite shocked by their service and this was via AIM support. I had a sales question reguarding a server deal/special they had at the time... VERY VERY UNPROESSIONAL. If they don't want my business, they can tell me nicly.
 
Harry said:
I've had a host tell me

"your some ****ing idiot dumb ****!! don't waste my time if you don't want our offer"

I was quite shocked by their service and this was via AIM support. I had a sales question reguarding a server deal/special they had at the time... VERY VERY UNPROESSIONAL. If they don't want my business, they can tell me nicly.
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Geezes, wonder what was in his cup of jo' that day! I don't think I've ever had a cs rep swear at me, but they do say that women in general are treated better than men when it comes to getting help online or even giving help to customers.
 
Well in several occasions when i had to ask a question from live support at some of the high end hosting sites, live support person ask back the same question from me lolzz or he would ask what's that,..can you explain etc etc, i see that as a very bad and unprofessional, i mean sure we all have to face up with this situation where as there are lot of things we dnt know abt, but wish there is a better way to tackle such situations without giving your self and your company a negative image :)
 
I just thought of one that hasn't been mentioned... that is "stop lying!" or something similar indicating that they are lying. Some customers have said that to me in the past! Specially about payment issues.
 
"Do you only hire stupid technicians?!"

I was quite upset at this so, especially after having explained to the customer that his issue was in no way related to the services we had provided him. I told him that there was no need to be rude or offensive. He said he didn't find what he said rude or offensive, so I asked him, "...if it'd be offensive if I stated that we had only stupid customers."

Shockingly, he was upset and demanded a refund. :p
 
I have gotten in to a habit of making the most insane reasons for problems, recent themes have included "The space time continuum" or other sci-fi-esque themes. Such as:

"So why was my server slow?" (he'd set his NIC to 10Mbps-HD)
"There was a misalignment in the space time continuum" not the funniest but when you're dealing with lots of these people you have to entertain yourself somehow
 
I have had a new support technician say to me once "and what do you want us to do about it"

Lets just say the support technician was not with that company for much longer
 
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I never use to be serious with my customers and as I am beginner, I cant afford to loose the customers. So, My first priority goes to my customer and then only I finish off my works. But If diarrhoea comes then I have no way.(Thank god, it hasn't come for me !)
 
Marks said:
Depends on the context of "Being Serious" or "Having a Laugh". Business philosophy's changes you can joke with some customers which is rare in the hosting industry, however with other industries I have been in you can have a personal relationship with your customers.
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Mate, you got to learn how to use PayPal. You can cancel the subscription and say get lost to your host (and of course get hosted by me :kiss:). CC too bad!:pirate:
 
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