If Operating Systems Ran The Airlines

A

ANMMark

New member
MAC Airlines
All captains, flight attendants, baggage handlers and ticket agents look and act the same. Each time you ask questions about details, you are gently but firmly told you don't need to know, don't want to know, and everything will be done for you without your ever having to know, so just shut up.

DOS Airlines
Everyone pushes the plane until it glides. They then jump on and let the plane coast until it hits the ground again. Then they push again, jump on again, and so on.

UNIX Airlines
Everyone brings one piece of the plane along when they come to the airport. They all go out on the runway and put the plane together piece by piece, arguing continually about what kind of plane they are supposed to be building.

Windows Airline
The terminal is very pretty and colorful, with friendly flight attendants, easy baggage check and boarding, and smooth take-off. Approximately ten minutes in the air, the plane explodes with no warning whatsoever.

Windows NT Airways
Similar to Windows Airline, but more expensive, uses much larger planes and takes out all other aircraft within a 35-mile radius when it explodes.
 
There are a ton more. I just don't want to spam the board with jokes all the time lol, unless Art says it's okay to post them occassionally. If he okays it, I'll go for weekly ;)
 
Exon said:
Maybe we should have a thread of just jokes?
Click to expand...
Well maybe you should just start one and stop looking at me for every little thing you guys want to do damn it!!!!!

Oops, have I been rude? :banned:

:D :crazy2:
 
Dan, probably just testing my nerves. :tired:
Its fine, John. To answer your question: you may start a joke thread. Just make sure the jokes do not offend anyone.
 
Defining Bravery

Bravery is arriving home late after a night out drinking, being confronted by your wife with a broom, and having the guts to ask:

Are you still cleaning, or are you flying somewhere?
 
ANMMark said:
Bravery is arriving home late after a night out drinking, being confronted by your wife with a broom, and having the guts to ask:

Are you still cleaning, or are you flying somewhere?
Click to expand...
:thumbsup:
 
Hunter Calls 911

Two guys are out in the woods hunting when one of them falls to the ground. His eyes are rolled back in his head and he doesn't appear to be breathing.

His buddy takes out his cell phone and immediately calls 911. Gasping, he says to the operator, "My friend is dead! What can I do?"

"Take it easy and calm down," the operator says in a calm voice. "I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead."

There's silence and then a shot is heard. The guy comes back on the phone and says, "OK, now what?"
 
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